Tuesday, 6 September 2011

One Starzillion of Reasons.

Knockin' - Van Ness Wu

why I love you Hahahaha #notfunny
Why I neeed to lose weight!
(And this time I'm sooo effin serious! This is a promise of lifetime - like really)
  1. I am fat! K, that's like an insult to all our real fatties. I'm not thin enough (especially cuz my BMI is er~ 20.4, while my personal dream BMI would be 16.7)
  2. Compared to Asian standards, I think I am quite fat.
    I decided to truly believe that Asians are skinnier than Westeners, while at the same time I am convined that idols lie about weight and height.
  3. Look at this:

    I know that the vid might be edited to make their legs look like super long, bt - excuse me?
    This is the bad influence of media, and I have a right to suffer under it.
  4. I am truly quiet fat around my cleavage.
  5. Because (you're my melody/ 너를 연주할게 on & on/ 넌 노래 내 삶의 사운드트랙/ 인생의 무댈 밝혀주는 너를 사랑해/ 또 불러줄래/ 넌 나의 노래)

I don't know how often I already said that I want to lose weight, but I was never serious enough about it.
I just can't.

One reason, why I eventually end up eating might be, because I don't look that fat. Ok I wear size 8/10 or 32/34 or XS/S, jeans is like 5.

So, when I'm bored and start to eat sth, I always think wtf, who cares. And actually nobody cares really.

I'm doing it mostly for me.
Still, it would be self-deceit to say that I'd do it just for me.
Few people are that independant.

On the other hand, I'm not interested in anyone's oppinion.

The other day I checked tumblr for some #thinspos.
And there are so many girls who want this huge gap between their legs. ふざけんな! In my eyes, it just looks retarded, ugly and deformed. Just unnatural.
Like a broken nose, a hunchback, knock knees, etc.

So, to all the girls who want a huge gap between their legs: じょだんじゃねよ!

Anyways for ppl who weigh under 85kg and do sports for less than half an hour a day, the max intake for losing weight is less than 1300kcal.

I wish I'd be better when it comes to estimate things!
I can't guess anything right, weight, quantity, height, length, time, price, age, etc. And calories~
I dunno much about my intake.

So before I start counting and going trough all the trouble summing up everything, I just eat very very little.

My standard diet plan looks like this:
  • 1/max 2 two small meals per day
  • consisting of max 3 dishes
  • no food after 6pm

Like this, I lose 1kg per day (2.2 lbs).
I can already hear everyone saying, But you don't lose fat! All you los is water/muscles! And it's unhealthy

I don't care if I lose water okay? I drink more than a camel drink after 2 months of wandering in the wilderness.
And I don't care about muscles. I'm not a boy~ I don't want any muscles.
Not even abs or whatever. (I can't do a single sit-up and push-up LOL, bt I can do fake pull-ups!)

All I care about is that clothes, which were quite tight yesterday, are super lose again today!

So much about losing weight (one more time!)

After thinking about it for a very long time, I may or may not had already around 300cal. (And it's 4.30pm)
I will eat another 300-500cal later then!

LOL, yeah I sound like some pro-ana fucktard.

zOMG, the other day I locked myself out and had to ring at our neighbours door, to ask them if I could go into their garden, to climb over their fence in our garden, to climb over the garden gate to break into our other tipped terrace door.

She was kind enough to even heave me over the fence, then I managed to cross the rose bed w/o major injuries and stood in front of our locked 2m high garden gate.

Luckily there was a chair standin around so I stood on it and had to untie a branch of a rose tree which hindered me to climb over the gate, like a barb wire fence.

Once I gracefully mastered this obstacle (I really think it look gracefull how I climber over the gate!), the biggest hindrance of all I had to overcome: The terrace door
It was tipped.

I could easily get my arm inside and move the handle, but I couldn't turn it around completely.

Guess this is some security function, which only allows you to turn the handle only, if the door is closed.
Which means: you can't do it from outside.

Luckily my IQ is 478. so I quickly found a string and managed to get into the house.

(I shall not tell you how, because I'm convinced that for average ppl - i.e. you - this would be too complicated.)

I'm back from my last trip (yeah I would blog more, if my life wouldn't be so busy, adventurous and mentally fertile - j/k). So, I wanted to talk about this for a long time already (and I think I have touched on that topic some time ago).

I'm sure you know bloggers who love to wallow in self-pity, all of their entries contain ironic contents about their shattered life.
Their posts contain pseudo witty and deep-thought stuffs like:



*shit bricks*

or quotes like
Consciousness is a terrible curse. I think. I feel. I suffer.

I like people to be unhappy because I like them to have souls.

I know this will come as a shock to you, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending."

There is nothing more pathetic, more disgraceful, poorer, more senseless, more psychopathic, more stupid and at the same time more ridiculous than those sad victims and kiddies, who - as limited as they are - have nothing better to do than extending their own failure, their self-pity and their already vain existence, through the arty celebration of their pitiful dasein by another considerable amount of meaninglessness.

To all those miserable kids a big FUCK YOU.
Your poor fate mightly amuses me (and I guess that's what you want if you exhibit it with so much demeanour).

I hope your life will be forever lousy or better even more fucked-up. 'scoffing laughter'

Chu, Ailing

1 comment :

  1. ur blogskin is so beautiful :3 and ur music too

    but the girls are too skinny...